WordPress reminded me that 6 years ago today, I posted a writing titled “To Die in Christ is to Live Fully.” A post about one of my best friend’s passing, Brittany. It was very timely as I had been pondering upon the subject of the end to suffering, death.
Sometime in late April or May, a group of friends went over to a hospice home to visit Pinky, she had been struggling with cancer. Stepping into her room tears of sadness began to flow as we sang hymns and read scripture to her. No friend wants to witness the suffering of another friend. Yet, it is with greater effort that then we ought to be friends. In her condition, she joked around and tasked-on to make us laugh, like a good friend would. More visits followed.
Later in May, I received a message that one of my friend’s mom’s cancer had come back very aggressively. I rang my friend and prayed, calmed and reassured he said that Gina, his mom, was calm and knew who she based her faith and trust on. This is a blessing, to know who we believe in, and “be persuaded that He is able.” As one ages, death can partially become irrelevant to the believer. It will cause grief and suffering but it increases our hope for our eternal future. The believer of a Risen Savior knows that God loves us deeply and only wants the best for our lives – and that we will get.
On Monday, May 25, I received the news that Gina was now resting in the Lord. It was Memorial Day, a day to remember the death of one more loved one. We had just come back from Mississippi, having had a beautiful experience of service; one of the most amazing miracles on that trip was that a man was rescued from committing suicide – God is working!
The day after Gina’s passing, I went over to visit Pinky. The nurse went into the room with me and mentioned that she may not be as responsive. Pinky opened her eyes and tried to talk but she struggled much. I asked Pinky if we could sing songs and read scripture, she had a soft look which led me to proceed on praying and singing. She really wanted to talk and tried several times to speak. “I’m sorry, I cannot understand you, but God knows exactly what you want to say, and knows how frustrated you may feel.” The look on her face was soft as she opened and closed her eyes. “You have beautiful blue eyes,” I said, and she smiled. I started reading Romans 8, she often knocked. Towards the end of the visit, she seemed uncomfortable, so I asked her if she was in pain, she was. I went on to mentioned it to the nurses, who came and gave her medication for it, Pinky said “thank you.” Those were the last word sounds that I heard from Pinky, she died the following morning.
Leaving the hospice home was sad, one holds tears until “it seems appropriate”… as I was driving back home the song “Life and Death” by Paul Cardall began to play, perhaps now “it was appropriate.” I was hopeful to see her again, but her suffering needed to end. God allows experiences to shape our lives in such a way that we do not regret living for others… unconditionally. It is impossible to do this with every person we meet, but for the moment being, not being present around those near death is not questionable, we have to be there, we just have to. This past Friday night, I was told that another friend ‘Taffy’ had been moved to hospice. I shouldn’t delay my arrival home to MA I thought, but sadly on Sunday around 10 am I received the message, “Taffy died this morning at 9:30 AM.” Did I selfishly wish to see her before her passing? Yes, I did, but I had to thanked God for sparing her life from more suffering. It is very appropriate to grieve to release tears of sadness as we remember the lives that shape who we are. We thank God for life and for death. We thank Him for laughter and for sorrow. We thank Him for being healthy or being sick. We thank God for our suffering because it makes us stronger each time and the joy that was set before Jesus is surely represented before us too. Let your tears be wiped by those cross nailed hands because He will restore you. Amen.
And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, write: for these words are true and faithful. And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely. Revelation 21:3-6
Tapia 